I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner: A question that has been pondered over the years by actors as diverse as Ally Sheedy and Lou Diamond Phillips. Lou Gramm laments here and gets his answer around the four minute mark.
Glory Of Love - Pete Cetera: The glory of Elisabeth Shue’s love proved motivation enough for Ralph Macchio to enter a karate championship woefully under prepared and over reliant on a manoeuvre that left him open to a well executed sweep kick.
Time Of My Life - Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes: The song that somehow fostered a begrudging respect between the post-war, old-school values and modern-jive enthusiast camps. It also secured Baby’s safe removal from the corner.
Here’s what you might hear at our live shows.
All Night Long - Lionel Richie: The God-fearing Judas of funk penned this calypso classic after he was asked how long he spends combing his jerry-curl.
Hold The Line – Toto: Vincent Hanley’s favourite piano-driven, session-rock song about love in a time before answering machines.
You’re The Voice - John Farnham: The mother of all calls to arms, complete with the call to arms instrument of choice - the bagpipe.
I Ain’t Missing You - John Waite: An understated power ballad which is apparently about the incarceration of John’s brother Terry by the Islamic Jihad group from 1987 to 1991. That may be a complete lie.
Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now – Starship: Andrew McCarthy and the love of his life – a mannequin – take a defiant look into the future. This would have made more sense if titled, “Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now Except Your Inanimate State”.
I’ll Be Ready (Baywatch Theme) - David Hasslehoff: The surf-soaked theme of the show that gave the kiss of life to prime-time Saturday evening viewing.
Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar: A mid-tempo lament on the hardship of protecting your passion bunker whilst it’s under attack from a humdrum offensiv
Boys Of Summer - Don Henley: The former Eagles’ finest moment, in which he grieves for the death of the hippie dream, brings back special memories of a saturated caravan park in Tramore for me. Was that what he intended I wonder? Maybe Don doesn’t even know, after all, he did start the decade arrested when cocaine, Quaaludes, and marijuana were found in his hotel room after a nude 16 year old prostitute had drug-related seizures.
Jack & Diane - Johnny Cougar Mellencamp: Blue-collar everyman, Mellencamp, honed his “poor man’s Springsteen” shtick with this tale of reality’s sting.
Dancing In The Dark - Bruce Springsteen: Not only the definitive song on the droning routine of small-town American life, it also launched the career of Courtney Cox. That’s why they call him The Boss.
Out Of Touch - Hall & Oates: These unsightly fellas were omnipotent in the ‘80s and this, their final great soul-pop hit of the era, acutely emphasised their fascination with absurd – some would say, almost meaningless - lyrics.
Ride Like The Wind - Christopher Cross: A man who looks more like an accountant than most award-winning accountant look-alikes, singing dolefully about fleeing a murder rap is almost as ridiculous as 1980 got. Almost: the motion picture, Popeye, was also released in this year.
Rosanna – Toto: David Paich’s sensitive homage to Rosanna Arquette, his girlfriend of the time, throws up one question: how in the name of all that is good in this world did a muggins like David Paich end up with Rosanna Arquette?
Time Of My Life - Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes: The song that somehow fostered a begrudging respect between the post-war, old-school values and modern-jive enthusiast camps. It also secured Baby’s safe removal from the corner.
Walk Like An Egyptian - The Bangles: This chart smash for the popular L.A. quartet should, unlike their other hits, remain uncovered by all contemporary girl groups due to its regrettable reinforcement of cultural stereotypes.
Dancing On The Ceiling - Lionel Richie: An unforgettable account of some inverted bopping that Lionel engaged in with Rodney Dangerfield and Cheech Marin back in ‘86.
Glory Of Love - Pete Cetera: The glory of Elisabeth Shue’s love proved motivation enough for Ralph Macchio to enter a karate championship woefully under prepared and over reliant on a manoeuvre that left him open to a well executed sweep kick.
Power Of Love - Huey Lewis & the News: In this, the theme to the undisputed cinematic paragon of the 1980s, Huey Lewis muses that the power of love is a curious thing; presumably because Elisabeth Shue didn’t sign up for the sequel.
Footloose - Kenny Loggins: A song so fancy-free it compelled Kevin Bacon and Chris Penn to wilfully humiliate themselves over and over and over again.
I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner: A question that has been pondered over the years by actors as diverse as Ally Sheedy and Lou Diamond Phillips. Lou Gramm laments here and gets his answer around the four minute mark.
We Built This City On Rock ‘N’ Roll – Starship: There are two options: Waste time planning the physical, social and economic development of metropolitan regions, municipalities and neighborhoods with respect to infrastructure, housing and ammenities or just build the fuckin’ thing on rock ‘n’ roll. Not much of a choice really.
Easy Lover – Phil Bailey and Phil Collins: This appeared on Bailey’s Chinese Wall album. The resentful lyrics suggest the former Earth, Wind and Fire singer may have been aided in its writing by a bitter, balding, cockney-scamp who used to drum in Genesis.
Maneater – Hall & Oates: Another huge hit for the third biggest act of the ‘80s. Biggest in terms of sales of course and not actual height; Oates is almost a midget.
She’s A Maniac – Michael Sembello: Many fears harboured by judges on the panels of hi-nrg dance auditions were allayed by Sembello’s assertion that Jennifer Beals was only violently insane ‘on the floor’. “Thanks be to Jaysus”, they were heard to exclaim.
Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes: Carnes chose to base her song – the 2nd best selling American single of the decade – on Davis’s early, electrifying performances. Had she based it on her later career, she well may have titled it “Face Like A Welder’s Table”.
Waiting For A Star To Fall – Boy Meets Girl: This husband and wife songwriting team utilised the popular 80s themes of nature and the mysterious workings of the Universe to express their love for each other. Sadly, life imitated art somewhat in this instance, as both were hit in the head by a huge asteroid in 1996.
I Knew You Were Waiting – George Michael and Aretha Franklin: The queen of soul and the queen of pop joined forces on this trans-atlantic smash written by Simon ‘Love Changes Everything’ Climie. Rumours that it was Franklin who turned Michael off women for good are seemingly unfounded.
Arthur’s Theme (The Best That You Can Do) – Christopher Cross: Personally I wouldn’t have thought that the best you could do, when stuck in a holding pattern somewhere between the Moon and New York city, is fall in love. I reckon curing all forms of disease, fostering peaceful relations in the Middle East, and chairing successful multi-lateral talks on our planet’s looming environmental crisis would be the best that you could do, but hey, maybe I’m just a dreamer.
What A Feeling – Irene Cara: “Irene, we’d like you to write the theme to our new movie Flashdance.” “Great, what’s it about?” “Alex Owens is a female dynamo: steel worker by day, exotic dancer by night. Her dream is to get into a real dance company though, and with encouragement from her boss/boyfriend, she may get her chance. The city of Pittsburgh co-stars. What a feeling!” “Seriously, what’s it about?”
Manic Monday – The Bangles: Poor old Suzanna Hoffs; late for work again! Want to know why she was late? “Of all the nights, why did my lover have to pick last night to get down?” Still have sympathy for her? I thought not.
I Wanna Dance With Somebody – Whitney Houston: Time was, that when the lonely night would fall, Whitney’s lonely heart would call. A different pattern emerged in the years following this song’s release however. Sundown suddenly began to precipitate calls by – in no particular order - crack dealers, child protection agencies, the LAPD and Bobby Brown’s many Candy Girls.
Top Gun Anthem – Steve Stevens and Harold Faltermeyer: It took the genius of Simpson and Bruckheimer to finally pair Brooklyn’s foremost proponent of ludicrous guitar histrionics, and a Munich born synth-pioneer renowned for his sledgemammer subtlety. The sheer size of this hymn-like theme shocked many upon its release and amazed others still, when it began to grow exponentially, in 1991. It is now so big it is stored under military guard, in a disused aircraft hangar in the Nevada desert.
Rush Hour – Jane Wiedlin: Former Go-Gos rhythm guitarist Wiedlin was born and raised in Oconomowoc, Wisconsin: a town with not a single set of traffic lights. When contacted, Mayor Maurice Sullivan stated: “Traffic is not a part of everyday life in Oconomowoc. The local records say that there was quite a commotion on Lake Road when Calvin Coolidge visited in 1927, but really that was an isolated incident.” Why must you turn this into a house of lies Wiedlin?