Here’s what you might hear at our live shows.

All Night Long – Lionel Richie

The God-fearing Judas of funk penned this calypso classic after he was asked how long he spends combing his jerry-curl.

I Wanna Dance With Somebody – Whitney Houston

Time was, that when the lonely night would fall, Whitney’s lonely heart would call. A different pattern emerged in the years following this song’s release however. Sundown suddenly began to precipitate calls by – in no particular order – crack dealers, child protection agencies, the LAPD and Bobby Brown’s many Candy Girls.

Don’t Stop Believing – Journey

The greatest song you’d never heard before 2007. Now the official anthem of Earth.

 Time Of My Life – Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes

The song that somehow fostered a begrudging respect between the post-war, old-school values and modern-jive enthusiast camps. It also secured Baby’s safe removal from the corner.

Dancing In The Dark – Bruce Springsteen

Not only the definitive song on the droning routine of small-town American life, it also launched the career of Courtney Cox. That’s why they call him The Boss.

Total Eclipse Of The Heart – Bonnie Tyler

Girls just Wanna Have Fun – Cindy Lauper

Like A Prayer – Madonna

You’re The One That I Want – John Travolta & Olivia Newton John

9 To 5 – Dolly Parton

Walking On Sunshine – Katrina & The Waves

Summer of 69 – Bryan Adams

The Best – Tina Turner

Uptown Girl – Billy Joel

I’m Still Standing – Elton John

Not much of a feat to write home about, you might think? You clearly don’t remember Elton John in the 80s, then.

Footloose – Kenny Loggins

A song so fancy-free it compelled Kevin Bacon and Chris Penn to wilfully humiliate themselves over and over and over again.

Call Me Al – Paul Simon

You, and you alone, can call me Al. Your friends can call me Ian. Your family can call me Gary. Your colleagues can call me Clive. And everyone else can call me Gordon.

 Livin’ On A Prayer – Bon Jovi

Hold On – Wilson Phillips

The Way You Make Me Feel – Michael Jackson

Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now – Starship

Andrew McCarthy and the love of his life – a mannequin – take a defiant look into the future. This would have made more sense if titled, “Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now Except Your Inanimate State”.

Africa – Toto

Ain’t Nobody – Chaka Khan

Written by Andrew Lloyd Webber and Sir Tim Rice, this was originally titled “There Isn’t One Single Person”. Rice only agreed to his lyrics being changed after himself and Ms Khan became romantically involved.

I’ll Be Ready (Baywatch Theme) – David Hasslehoff

The surf-soaked theme of the show that gave the kiss of life to prime-time Saturday evening viewing.

There are two options: Waste time planning the physical, social and economic development of metropolitan regions, municipalities and neighborhoods with respect to infrastructure, housing and ammenities or just build the fuckin’ thing on rock ‘n’ roll. Not much of a choice really.

What A Feeling – Irene Cara

“Irene, we’d like you to write the theme to our new movie Flashdance.” “Great, what’s it about?””Alex Owens is a female dynamo: steel worker by day, exotic dancer by night. Her dream is to get into a real dance company though, and with encouragement from her boss/boyfriend, she may get her chance. The city of Pittsburgh co-stars. What a feeling!””Seriously, what’s it about?”

Power Of Love – Huey Lewis & the News

In this, the theme to the undisputed cinematic paragon of the 1980s, Huey Lewis muses that the power of love is a curious thing; presumably because Elisabeth Shue didn’t sign up for the sequel.

1999 – Prince

Material Girl – Madonna

Back when this was released it was fun to imagine what material goods would gain Madonna’s affection. Now it’s far more entertaining to figure out what material she resembles. Melted plastic? Welded iron? A discarded sack?

Jump – The Pointer Sisters

You should be thankful these ladies merely request you to ‘jump’ for their love. I wasn’t quite so lucky one humid night back in 1983.

Waiting For A Star To Fall – Boy Meets Girl

This husband and wife songwriting team utilised the popular 80s themes of nature and the mysterious workings of the Universe to express their love for each other. Sadly, life imitated art somewhat in this instance, as both were hit in the head by a huge asteroid in 1996.

I Knew You Were Waiting – George Michael and Aretha Franklin

The queen of soul and the queen of pop joined forces on this trans-atlantic smash written by Simon ‘Love Changes Everything’ Climie. Rumours that it was Franklin who turned Michael off women for good are seemingly unfounded.

Jump – Van Halen

Can’t you see David Lee Roth standing there, he’s got his back against the record machine? He ain’t the worst that you seen? See what I mean?

No? Yeah, you’re right.

 Walk Like An Egyptian – The Bangles

This chart smash for the popular L.A. quartet should, unlike their other hits, remain uncovered by all contemporary girl groups due to its regrettable reinforcement of cultural stereotypes.

Dancing On The Ceiling – Lionel Richie

An unforgettable account of some inverted bopping that Lionel engaged in with Rodney Dangerfield and Cheech Marin back in ‘86.

Jack & Diane – Johnny Cougar Mellencamp

Blue-collar everyman, Mellencamp, honed his “poor man’s Springsteen” shtick with this tale of reality’s sting.

How Will I Know? – Whitney Houston

The answer, Whitney, is you won’t. You, more than anyone, simply won’t know. You will, in fact, never know.

She’s Like The Wind – Patrick Swayze

Easy Lover – Phil Bailey and Phil Collins

This appeared on Bailey’s Chinese Wall album. The resentful lyrics suggest the former Earth, Wind and Fire singer may have been aided in its writing by a bitter, balding, cockney-scamp who used to drum in Genesis.

She’s A Maniac – Michael Sembello

Many fears harboured by judges on the panels of hi-nrg dance auditions were allayed by Sembello’s assertion that Jennifer Beals was only violently insane ‘on the floor’. “Thanks be to Jaysus”, they were heard to exclaim.

 Love Is A Battlefield – Pat Benatar

A mid-tempo lament on the hardship of protecting your passion bunker whilst it’s under attack from a humdrum offensive

Boys Of Summer – Don Henley

The former Eagles’ finest moment, in which he grieves for the death of the hippie dream, brings back special memories of a saturated caravan park in Tramore for me. Was that what he intended I wonder? Maybe Don doesn’t even know, after all, he did start the decade arrested when cocaine, Quaaludes, and marijuana were found in his hotel room after a nude 16 year old prostitute had drug-related seizures.

I’m So Excited – The Pointer Sisters

I’m not in the slightest bit surprised. Seriously, the things this shower get up to.

Maneater – Hall & Oates

Another huge hit for the third biggest act of the ‘80s. Biggest in terms of sales of course and not actual height; Oates is almost a midget.

Hold The Line – Toto

Vincent Hanley’s favourite piano-driven, session-rock song about love in a time before answering machines.

 Rosanna – Toto

David Paich’s sensitive homage to Rosanna Arquette, his girlfriend of the time, throws up one question: how in the name of all that is good in this world did a muggins like David Paich end up with Rosanna Arquette?

Glory Of Love – Pete Cetera

The glory of Elisabeth Shue’s love proved motivation enough for Ralph Macchio to enter a karate championship woefully under prepared and over reliant on a manoeuvre that left him open to a well executed sweep kick.

Out Of Touch – Hall & Oates

These unsightly fellas were omnipotent in the ‘80s and this, their final great soul-pop hit of the era, acutely emphasised their fascination with absurd – some would say, almost meaningless – lyrics.

Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes

Carnes chose to base her song – the 2nd best selling American single of the decade – on Davis’s early, electrifying performances. Had she based it on her later career, she well may have titled it “Face Like A Welder’s Table”.

Money For Nothing – Dire Straits

A song mollycoddled, millionaire musician, Mark Knopfler immediately regretted writing when he had to get plumber around to fix his radiators shortly after its release.

I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner

A question that has been pondered over the years by actors as diverse as Ally Sheedy and Lou Diamond Phillips. Lou Gramm laments here and gets his answer around the four minute mark.